It Was Summertime in Northern Michigan
Whether or not you are a fan of Kid Rock, there’s a good chance you may have heard the lyrics to “All Summer Long.” Not all Michiganders would confess to the song writers playful teenage antics (at least not publicly) but anyone who has vacationed in Michigan can relate to the key lyrics of: “It was summertime in northern Michigan.”
The other day at an Advisory Committee Meeting I chair, the introductory questions was, “Name one thing for which you are grateful in the last two weeks.” One response was, “Summers in Michigan!”
Yup, there’s nothing like it.
Last weekend Deb and I had the opportunity to enjoy some of Michigan’s beauty: Lake Charlevoix area.
I officiated a wedding on the south shore of Lake Charlevoix on Saturday evening. The setting was magnificent as the guests observed the wedding ceremony with Lake Charlevoix in the background. The reception was on the roof-top deck on star-lit evening cooled by the lake breeze.
Sunday we leisurely toured Charlevoix – walking out to the lighthouse – then Petoskey, and Little Traverse Bay. The myriad shades of the blue water were breath-taking. The next two days spent at Boyne Mountain Grand Lodge Resort lounging at the pool and reading couldn’t have been better.
Whatever you may do this summer to get-away, relax, recalibrate, or somehow take care of your spirit, may you truly be re-created:
Defined as: to refresh by means of relaxation and enjoyment; restore physically or mentally
On Retreat
I’m not sure what the words “on retreat” stir, or for that matter do not stir, in you.
Many of us have been on retreats that don’t resemble a retreat in any fashion. The schedule is packed solid from early morning to late in the evening. There is no space for personal reflection. Activities are the norm and expected. The point of getting away is an information download – “dump.” No wonder we walk away feeling more emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually exhausted.
Decades ago (that makes me sound old) I remember becoming part of leadership team that organized the retreat around that mantra. We were proud that we gave them so much information. We thrived on their exhaustion. It was almost a badge of honor to have blank stares by the closing session on Sunday early afternoon.
For the second year in a row I am on retreat. But I choose my retreats carefully. First and foremost, any retreat has to have at its core the value of recreation: re-creating me at every level. Nothing short of this goal!
So here I am in northern mid-Michigan. Here’s what I’ve experienced already and am creating space for such activities to continue:
The leaders of the retreat arrived 24 hours early to relax, unwind, converse, share, have some wine, and of course, smoke a cigar.
This morning we quietly entered the day; grateful and asking for blessings.
In the hours before the retreat begins it is eerily quiet. There’s a guy napping in front of the fire. Somebody just stopped me to ask a question and then quietly walked away. The mood is good and the conversations are more hushed and reflective. Everything is all set up and now we getting ready to receive the fellow retreaters.
This evening begins with a great dinner and then rhythm of sessions, which include many stories. After each session there is a “covenant of silence” for 45 minutes, to journal and reflect.
Each evening ends with cigars around the fire.
We will not leave this retreat exhausted.
Challenged? Certainly!
Inspired! No doubt!
Re-created! If we’re open!
Notice the Ashes
There will be people today who choose to celebrate this day, Ash Wednesday – the beginning of Lent – by having ashes placed on their forehead. Lent begins a forty day season in the Liturgical Church Year where people are encouraged to give attention to their inner journey of faith. While this is mostly practiced by mainline denominations around the world, the rest of us can take notice.
The familiar Lenten question is, “What are you giving up for Lent?” That is a good question but it isn’t the real focus of the season. Giving up seems to direct the focus toward us; making self-denial and our ability to control life and our future, the actual goal. Yet, that was not the genesis of this season.
Ironically, Lent falls when winter and spring vie for dominance in the weather pattern. The symbolism is stark. What will vie for our attention?
At some level we know there are the noisy din of voices that in some fashion shout that we are no good, ugly, worthless, despicable, or nobody – unless we can somehow demonstrate the opposite. These negative voices are so loud and persistent that it is easy to believe them. If we approach self-denial, or Lent for that matter, with the goal of proving that we are somebody and that if we just do a little more, then our efforts will only suffice to fuel the negative voices.
So what’s the point with ashes?
Ashes, from the burned branches of last year’s Palm Sunday celebration are placed on the forehead as a symbolic gesture signifying that we are human; finite and mortal. This isn’t meant to be morbid. Rather, it is meant to limit our grandiosity and help us stay in touch with the real human condition that we all share. Reminding us that everything we work for turns to ash in the end. It’s a challenge to admit that everything we worked for eventually turns to ash, but as a friend told me, “it’s also liberating. It frees us from the misplaced and destructive notion that we are defined by our achievements and lauded because of our accomplishments.”
Today, if you see someone with ashes on their forehead, take a moment to notice!
Spend a couple of minutes reflecting on the voices that get your attention. Be aware of what may be driving you. And, if you dare, stay with the silence long enough to listen to a still, small voice that may be calling you to something deeper, something more true. It just may be calling your heart to a real place of rest.
What If I Were Ready?
I was feeling a bit dejected last week. Upon completing two consecutive days of seminars I heard from another organization that due to the economy they would not need my services until the fall. Ouch! Other avenues of income were not in the foreseeable future. I knew having my own business would take a yeoman’s effort and dedication to the long haul
.
I had been advised that whatever difficulty I face I must maintain a positive attitude of readiness. Now, more than ever, I had to lean on that wisdom.
At some level it wasn’t too difficult. I have been dedicating myself to certain rhythms in order to maintain a positive state of readiness. With a commitment to my personal transformation, here’s what I did:
- At the beginning of the year I changed my approach to food and fitness. Meaning, I began to exercise in earnest and eat the correct foods or for that matter avoiding those foods which are bad for me. The results have been better than I could have imagined. (I will blog about that in the future.)
- I continued with the disciplines of my soul care: solitude, journaling, reading, and meeting with close friends for encouragement and challenge.
- I reserved time to read – blogs, articles, books, et cetera – with the intent of learning more and enhancing my personal development. For those who know me that means I voraciously took notes and sought to better understand new thoughts and maximize the ones with which I was already familiar. (This blog is the result of such learning.)
- I allocated time to network with others, especially with those who are in my similar line of work. The term “networking” is a bit-overused-buzz-word. Yet, the principles of networking are time-tested and the stories of success are well-documented.
Again, I did all this to maintain a level of readiness. I took the good-natured jabs that all I do is exercise, spend hours at Uptown Coffeehouse (in my hometown), and when the weather was nice park myself at Thompson Lake with a lawn chair. I can take the trash-talk because it IS my rhythm most days. My premise is that if I don’t have anything on the docket to give to others I need to make sure I give time to myself in order to be ready.
So, last Thursday I’m going through the inner-pep-talk, “Hang in there! Stay positive! You’re doing the right things!” I so wanted to believe it wasn’t gibberish. Then…
- On Friday I meet with a contact through LinkedIn. She is a kindred spirit who not only encouraged me but wants to partner with me on some projects going forward. In fact, she made sure to introduce me to another coach who invested in her training.
- On Monday I met with someone who was recommended to me by another LinkedIn contact. Get that? One coach recommending me (a coach) to another coach. The upshot of this meeting is that we connected and she invited me to give a presentation to a group of executives she coaches.
- On Wednesday I spent an hour on the phone with a gentleman who helped develop the tool used by Gallup to determine a person’s dominant talent themes. Because of the sponsorship of another coach he is willing to invest in my professional growth and connect me with his program.
- Today I spent time at Caribou with another coach who trains executives around the country and coaches team excellence. Not only did we brainstorm about the future but he offered clarity as I seek to develop my niche.
What if I were not ready? What if I had given up and chose to be negative? What if I let anger, disgust, or discouragement take over?
All I know is that I am grateful for those who lovingly speak the kind truth to me to “Be Ready!”
What if you were ready?
How’s Life?
“How’s life?” is the introductory phrase usually spoken with the intent there will be no answer. However, let’s imagine the question is genuinely asked anticipating an honest answer: “How’s life…is it happy, pleasant, good, or maybe even meaningful?”
Martin Seligman in his book, Authentic Happiness, writes of three forms of happiness:
1. Pleasant Life: a life full of positive emotion about the past, present, or future
2. Good Life: a life where you are using your “signature strengths” – those things at which you are good.
3. Meaningful Life: knowing what your highest strengths are and deploying them in the service of something larger than you are.
To Whom Should I Ask The Question?
To Myself: It’s well worth spending some quiet time in solitude reflecting on the health of your soul. Maybe it’s on the deck, a coffee shop, or the park this summer. “How’s my life?” It may lead to a variety of responses: sadness, confession, gratitude, et cetera. Wherever it takes me, it’s worth noticing as I realize that others cannot answer this question for me. The gift I give myself is the answer to the question.
To Others: I remind myself that as I greet people for the first time it may be better to simply say, “Hello!” than ask the question, “How’s life?” For me, it’s a more honest reflection. When the opportunity affords itself for the “How’s life?” question – and it often does – it flows more genuinely. More importantly than asking the question is the answer. This is where it takes intentional effort on my part to actually listen: to hear what is being said, to be attentive to the emotions, and to decipher if the person wants to engage even further. Sounds elementary? It may be, but I need a reminder of this Primer on a regular basis.
Let me know how you’re doing…
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mark@whatifenterprises.com
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