4 Ways to Turn Rejection into a Motivating Force
Written by M.Farouk Radwan
Founder of http://www.2knowmyself.com
We all feel bad when we get rejected and we all wish to know how to handle rejections in a better.
There are tons of advice about getting over rejection everywhere and most of them are useful but what I thought about is finding new advice that can’t just let you get over rejection but that can help you turn this rejection into a motivating force that can push you forward.
In this article I will tell you about four things that can help you become motivated after you get rejected!
4 ways to turn rejection into motivation
- Decide that you will prove those who rejected you wrong: Soichiro Honda the founder of Honda company was rejected when he went for a job interview to work for the Toyota company. The man didn’t just decide to get over rejection but he decided to create a company that competes with Toyota in order to prove them wrong and this is how Honda was born!! When someone rejects you decide that you are going to prove him wrong even if that was few years later
- Learn from the mistake: Each rejection can be considered a blocked road or an opportunity to learn how to do things in a better way. If you got rejected than promise yourself you are going to do your best the next time and you will find yourself motivated.
- Read about the success stories of successful people: Almost all successful people were rejected many times during their early years. As soon as you reach about such stories you will discover that you are following their path exactly and that there is nothing wrong with you.
- Write the names of those who reject you or keep their pictures: When I first started my website a man sent me an email making fun of me. I felt really bad and I decided to save his email to reply back one day. 3 years later when the website was getting 500,000 hits/month I mailed him telling him about the progress and the man didn’t dare to reply back J One of the most powerful things that can motivate you after rejections is to keep a list of the people who rejected you so that you can contact them later and tell them about the great mistake they did.
Final words about rejection
Of course I am already assuming that the rejection didn’t happen as a result of your fault. If you didn’t do your homework then failed to reach something then you should focus on working harder instead of trying to prove others wrong.
This approach should be used when you believe that you did your best yet you found many rejections.
Let me know what you think…
Do You Ever Feel Unmotivated?
Something is holding me back.
Does that ever happen to you?
You know what needs to be done. You are aware of the benefit and the importance of pushing through whatever it may be that is holding you back. Yet…getting out of the starting gate doesn’t happen.
That’s happening to me in relation to my BLOG.
I restarted blogging for two specific reasons: to connect me with like-minded people on subjects that are part of my DNA and to fuel my creative juices. There is just something beneficial about writing. I was instructed that you need to be able to write at least fifty blog posts on the subject. As of today, I’ve written sixty and truthfully, for two weeks I’ve been stuck.
I’ve started and stopped writing many times. I’ve read other blogs and even commented on a few. In fact, someone I care about deeply and who knows me better than anyone else (any guesses?) emailed me today, “I haven’t received a blog from you in weeks…any special reason? I miss it!”
I clicked her email to the Trash and then, after two minutes started writing.
As someone who coaches people to engage with their unique strengths I know that her unique strength set equips her to be a great coach, which she has done admirably for years. And today is no exception. With two sentences she was able to rattle my cage. She didn’t necessarily give me clarity. She certainly didn’t judge me. She just noticed something that’s been on the forefront of my mind for weeks and named it. That’s what coaches do…and so do friends, and if you’re really blessed, so does our spouse.
So this BLOG is for those of you who get stuck; who may find yourself without much motivation. May you have someone in your life that actually notices and not only notices, but cares about you enough to say something about what they perceive!
I’m grateful that I do. Thanks Deb!
Elizabeth Edwards’ Gift (Just Weeks Ago)
What I will remember about Elizabeth Edwards is the gift she gave me less than nine weeks ago at the Livingston Economic Club, held at Cleary University in Howell, MI. I was privileged to be in attendance and even meet her in a small reception prior to her speech. I think it’s her last public speaking engagement.
She was gracious and kind. Her words, on stage and in face-t0-face had the depth of someone who understood that life on this side of the veil was short. She admitted that even though she stayed the night before right next to Tanger Outlet Mall, shopping did not hold the same appeal. She was honest and forthright.
What was most enduring was her calm and sensitive spirit. You could see it in her smile, sense it in words, and even as she signed dozens and dozens of autographs after her speech. She looked every person in the eye and smiled with radiancy. Virtually depleted, she mustered enough strength for the moment. I spent minutes just watching her interact.
The last posting on her Facebook page reflected her enduring spirit,
“I have found that in the simple act of living with hope, and in the daily effort to have a positive impact in the world, the days I do have are made all the more meaningful and precious.”
I was given a gift on October 7, 2010. I think I appreciate it even more today.
The Power of “Ask”
Last evening my wife and I spent a couple of hours hanging out at our local coffee shop; sharing our favorite holiday drink, reading, and conversation. A guitar player provided his own renditions of Christmas carols with a classical and personal twist. It wasn’t a surprise he was there. He plays there often and his wife posted on Facebook his schedule. The gift for me was two-fold: listening to his amazing talent (a successful business man who just loves to play the guitar) and the story of how we met twenty-five years ago.
In the mid-80′s I arrived at a very traditional Lutheran church in Southeast Michigan with the charge to “revitalize” – their words, not mine – the congregation. I had served as pastor of a successful, cutting-edge church in Milwaukee, so the opportunity to provide the same modern flair and edge seemed like a “piece of cake.” With youthful exuberance and cockiness I began to introduce a contemporary style to this traditional setting. Come to think of it, I really didn’t introduce it; probably more like forced it.
One of the wholesale changes I made was the way we approached the children’s and youth programs. I suggested we rock the boat at the first Vacation Bible School. The first components we introduced centered around an odd concept at the time: “FUN.” Nothing is worse for a kid to have to endure a summer “school” activity for hours and not have any fun. We intentionally amped the energy, the games, and even the music.
It was clear to me that the last component would hinge in the hands and talent of a shoulder-lengthed-haired teenager. As an introvert he had a good sense of humor. Rumor was he could make a guitar “rock.” I asked if I could come to his house to hear him play. One spring evening his parents welcomed me into their lovely home and after some pleasantries I found myself in a teenage boy’s room lined with posters of his favorites “rockers.” In the corner were his amps and his favorite possession. I expected to hear a kid play five chords on an acoustic guitar. Instead I got a mini-concert; much more than I bargained for…in a good way.
“Andy, how would you like to play guitar for VBS?” I asked. “Really?” he quizzically looked at me, “Sure, I guess so.” This interchange reminded me again of The Power of “ASK.”
That year, Andrew Hively rocked-out at VBS and to the shock of the leaders, we decided to let him rock-out during the Sunday services. Paramedics were on stand-by as this organ-only, highly traditional congregation got their first taste of a guitar during their sacred gathering.
I became a true fan of Andrew that summer and for the past twenty-five years have watched as he served in bands of every size and composition. One can always tell that behind his subtle riffs and amazingly sharp chord progressions is a highly talented musician. When given the opportunity for solos, people marvel.
Last night, at Uptown Coffeehouse, with my wife across the table, and Andrew Hively providing the best guitar music one could imagine I journaled in gratitude. I was grateful for life and the journey. I couldn’t imagine a more comforting setting. As I looked up and saw Andrew, now with teenagers of his own, I was grateful that he said “Yes!” years ago.
I’m so grateful Andrew continues to fully embrace this talent. Give yourself a three-minute gift and listen: Christmas tracks or a song called Forgiveness.
What if…we stepped into the possibilities of just making an “Ask?”
Action…Not Terminology
One of the elderly couples in the condominium complex in which we live recently faced the inevitable challenges of their age. When we moved here three years ago we could see that the gentleman was failing as his steps were halting; moving from a cane to walker, eventually to a wheelchair. Months passed. The walks became more infrequent. Once in a while the wife would step out to manicure her flowers, even her daily flag hanging was irregular. Then, the ambulance came, not once, but five times over a couple of months. Today, there is no activity and a for sale sign is in the front window. A graphic reminder of the circle of life.
What my wife and I bore witness to was the response of their friends and family. People, neighbors and those who traveled a distance would check in, stay overnight, or sit at the kitchen table and simply “be with” them. Near the end, people of all ages were there 24/7 providing care and compassion. You could see that whatever was needed, if humanly possible, it would be provided.
What spurs this type of compassion?
What motivates people to serve?
Why the altruism?
Without making today’s topic a study of human behavior we can at least make the point that selfless behavior – giving myself on behalf of others – can be called forth. Some of us respond more than others. Others of us are stirred differently. But if we allow whatever walls we have erected to be pierced by compassion, we will respond.
Altruism, in whatever form, is a selfless concern for the welfare of others. A virtue in many cultures and core traditions of most religions. More than just a feeling of loyalty or a call to duty (which is more about obligation), altruism focuses on the motivation to help others or to do good without reward. Transformational people will be in the process of learning how to intentionally be driven more by altruism.
Servant leadership is a philosophy and practice of leadership, coined and defined by Robert Greenleaf and supported by many leadership and management writers which define leadership more in terms of influence through serving. Servant leaders are often seen as humble stewards of their organization’s resources (human, financial and physical). They propose that servant leaders achieve results for their organizations by giving priority attention to the needs of their colleagues and those they serve.
Are there qualities or competencies of a servant leader? Most servant leaders who have influenced me practiced all of these skills at some level, depending on their personality: listening, empathy, healing, awareness, persuasion, conceptualization, foresight, stewardship, growth and building community. These skills may take a lifetime to master. Acquiring them takes intentional effort.
A servant leader doesn’t just possess a skill set. They are more attuned to their character; what goes on behind the scenes. A servant leader knows that people will sense whether these competencies are genuine. People are well-versed at being lied to or manipulated. Therefore, they are looking for real, credible leaders who they believe and even feel, are people who can be trusted. That’s why Greenleaf wrote, ”It begins with the natural feeling that one wants to serve, to serve first. Then conscious choice brings one to aspire to lead.”
The people who responded to my neighbors were altruistic as they served. It wasn’t demeaning. They weren’t caught up in how they were perceived. They saw a need and responded. What I learned was another lesson in serving.
What if…we chose to respond selflessly to others – no matter what it’s called?
Reserve Your Free Consultation!
mark@whatifenterprises.com
Openings Are Filling Quickly!On the Social Web
