Dynamics of a Transformational Person (3of4)
This is the third of four BLOGS dedicated to reflecting more of the “why” of being a transformational person. My premise is that if someone understands the “why” being of transformational person it will sustain them, inspire them, and give them sustainability.
Transformational people are other-centered!
I spent five years working in the hospitality industry. My learning curve in every area of the business was steep. While I interacted with many wonderful, bright, compassionate people, I realized early on that there are just as many other people whose actions reveal a negative mindset to those in the service industry. I would regularly have to coach my team members how to navigate clients who:
- Demanded service combined with a demeaning tone
- Rolled their eyes in disgust
- Intentionally left messes stating that it was someone else’s job to clean up after them
One could argue that anyone who enters the hospitality industry should expect some rudeness. That is true. I would counter with an “and…” What we experienced was systemic of a larger issue; dealing with an unhealthy ego. An unhealthy ego is truly egocentric, approaching life with a selfish pretense that seeks to put self interests over the collective interests of others. It manifests itself in the way we manipulate life to be in control and our rigidity at anything that challenges it.
Our society has even adopted a phrase used by young and old alike, “Sucks to be you!”
As transformational people choose to live more in alignment with their values they are free to serve the world. Liberated from the bonds of insecurity and fear they can engage, fully attentive to the needs of others, making wise decisions of when and where they can be of need.
Transformational people – who are pursuing inner transformation and a new normal – choose a different perspective. They intentionally put rhythms in their life to support the “why”: they seek to become people who are other-centered.
- They seek to build rapport with people, establishing healthy boundaries
- They genuinely want others to succeed and cheer them on to be their best
- They seek to serve others, engaging in a variety of activities around their unique talents
- They have empathy, not only allowing themselves to feel but also to be compassionate and take time for others
If you to take some steps on becoming a transformational person, step three is to intentionally look for ways to serve others. When you know the “why” your “how” and “what” will have the right inspiration and direction.
What if… you took the opportunity to serve the people you meet today?
Dynamics of a Transformational Person (2of4)
This is the second of four BLOGS dedicated to reflecting more of the “why” of being a transformational person. My premise is that if someone understands the “why” being of transformational person it will sustain them, inspire them, and give them sustainability.
Transformational people are inner-directed!
At first blush this may sound that I’m advocating a type of focusing on self that borders on narcissism. Actually, it is quite the opposite. The airlines have been instructing passengers for decades that if the emergency oxygen masks deploy and you have a child be sure to put your mask on first. They are reminding parents that to “be there” for their child they need to take care of themselves first.
All of us face some kind of “normal” whereby we tend to define ourselves by the opinions, beliefs, and perceptions of others. Marketing campaigns are designed to appeal to our temptation to purchase products based on how it will establish us in relation to other people. They have learned that whether we like it or not, there is a part of us that is tempted by social pressure. It is manifested at its worst when we make decisions based on upon “what other people think.”
The ugly truth is that if we are intentional, this ugly dynamic will be a driving force by which we measure our success and compare ourselves to others.
Transformational people – who are pursuing inner transformation and a new normal – choose a different perspective. They intentionally put rhythms in their life to support the “why”: they seek to become people who are inner-directed.
- They are clear about their values and define themselves by these non-negotiable.
- Their values not only give them strength and freedom. They approach life with a deep sense of calmness because they have clarity about who they are.
- Because they have deep-seated values they are able to view situations with a more complex understanding because the situation does not define them.
- They recalibrate to their values on a regular basis in order to assure that their behaviors match their intentions.
If you want to take some steps on becoming a transformational person, step two is to be clear about your values. When you know the “why” your “how” and “what” will have the right inspiration and direction.
What if… you knew your values and aligned to them regularly?
On Retreat
I’m not sure what the words “on retreat” stir, or for that matter do not stir, in you.
Many of us have been on retreats that don’t resemble a retreat in any fashion. The schedule is packed solid from early morning to late in the evening. There is no space for personal reflection. Activities are the norm and expected. The point of getting away is an information download – “dump.” No wonder we walk away feeling more emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually exhausted.
Decades ago (that makes me sound old) I remember becoming part of leadership team that organized the retreat around that mantra. We were proud that we gave them so much information. We thrived on their exhaustion. It was almost a badge of honor to have blank stares by the closing session on Sunday early afternoon.
For the second year in a row I am on retreat. But I choose my retreats carefully. First and foremost, any retreat has to have at its core the value of recreation: re-creating me at every level. Nothing short of this goal!
So here I am in northern mid-Michigan. Here’s what I’ve experienced already and am creating space for such activities to continue:
The leaders of the retreat arrived 24 hours early to relax, unwind, converse, share, have some wine, and of course, smoke a cigar.
This morning we quietly entered the day; grateful and asking for blessings.
In the hours before the retreat begins it is eerily quiet. There’s a guy napping in front of the fire. Somebody just stopped me to ask a question and then quietly walked away. The mood is good and the conversations are more hushed and reflective. Everything is all set up and now we getting ready to receive the fellow retreaters.
This evening begins with a great dinner and then rhythm of sessions, which include many stories. After each session there is a “covenant of silence” for 45 minutes, to journal and reflect.
Each evening ends with cigars around the fire.
We will not leave this retreat exhausted.
Challenged? Certainly!
Inspired! No doubt!
Re-created! If we’re open!
5 Ways to Become Super Creative
Guest Blogger: M.Farouk Radwan
People mistakenly think that creativity has anything to do with genes and that’s why those who believe that they are not creative remain the way they are.
In fact creativity is nothing more than a combination of your belief system and your life style. In order to become more creative you just need to alter few of your beliefs and make some permanent changes to your life style.
In this post I will tell you about five ways that can make you super creative:
1) Creativity is related to observation: Most of the creative ideas come from observing your surroundings. Walt Disney decided to create the famous character Mickey mouse when he saw a rat wandering in his house. By learning how to spend more time observing your surroundings you will find yourself becoming more creative.
2) Creativity is hiding your sources: Einstein ones said that creativity is hiding your sources. Some people get this saying wrong and believe that they have to steal the idea so of other people but that’s completely wrong. When you observe others you will find yourself collecting a piece of information from here and a piece of information from there until you will end up with something brand new as a result of the information mixture you acquired.
3) Dedicate free time for creative thinking: Research has shown that routine is a great creativity killer. If you want to become more creative than you must dedicate some free time where you prevent yourself from being bound by any rules. During this time you can try to do the same things you used to do in a different way or to try to do things you have never done before.
4) Don’t put any constrains while thinking: Most people do the mistake of thinking of new possibilities while being constrained by certain facts. In order to become truly creative you need to think without any constrains. Even if your ideas seemed irrational in the beginning sooner or later you will bump into something that makes sense.
5) Get rid of the fear of failure: Because many people fear taking risks and fear failure they remain stuck in their comfort zones and never attempt to try anything new. Creativity is all about doing few wrong things until you find one right thing that works. If you fear taking risks then you will never try new things and you will kill your creativity.
Just as you saw creativity is not exclusive for anyone but it requires some dedication in order for someone to acquire it.
M.Farouk Rad is the Founder of http://www.2knowmyself.com
Everyday Mindset
The two questions that bring clarity to most anything we are involved in are:
What’s the successful outcome?
What’s the next action to make it happen?
This is the way David Allen began a section of the email/newsletter (“Productive Living” – 01.12.11)
No matter our role, defining outcomes and actions can be particularly challenging. But this just doesn’t apply to projects or assignments.
What about the way we approach each day?
What about our mindset? Do you ever notice how quickly our attitude can be side-tracked by interruptions (some may even be genuine) or when our own negativity and pessimism seeps in like sludge. Add to that, we probably bump into too many people who are part of the “ain’t-it-awful club” that pour fuel on our cynical spark or seek to squelch our optimism like a bucket of water.
Here’s David suggestion about the choice to think differently by beginning our day with an “outcome” mindset rhythm….
- How you’d like to feel when you wake up.
- How you’d like the meeting to turn out.
- What kind of energy you’d like to have all during the day.
- How you’d like the people close to you to feel.
- What you’d like to have accomplished.
- How relaxed you could be.
- How much fun you could have.
- What good you could do.
- What joy you could spread.
- How you’d like your desk to look.
- What peace you could bring.
- What loving you could share.
- What sense of connection you’d like with yourself and your world, and with others.
- How you’d like to feel, reading your email.
“It is wonderful to understand that what we hold in our mind as a focus aligns powerful and automatic forces to open our perceptions and harness energy. The bad news is that we no longer have any excuses for not utilizing that awareness.”
What if…we spend just a few minutes at the beginning of each day aligning our mind?(revisit it as needed)
Reserve Your Free Consultation!
mark@whatifenterprises.com
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